The memories of my childhood and teens began to return in my late 20���s, when long black dreams (where I was in a mist or floating trying to reach for something), began to clear so that I could see the places where my mother had taken me, and the people that called to The Elders by means of a sing-song chant. With this chant a portal would open in a wall and an Elder would step through. The first time I met an Elder I was five years old, the two years prior the women-with some older girls eight to ten years old-had been training/teaching me to trust and do whatever the Elders told me to do. The main symbol they used you had to look at until the parts began to swirl. You would enter that swirling vision, floating, with your every sense alive. Then they would touch you and their thoughts became one with yours. They-women or girls-never spoke, only with their touch did you hear their thoughts. I have never felt the power they transferred to me, when we touched, in any other human, nor the knowledge; both would fade after leaving them. The Elder never came through the portal, but motioned for me to come to him. All I could see was a big black robed figure. The woman holding my hand thought to me that this was to be my Elder and that I needed to trust and obey all he told me to do, without pause or question. Something a five year old, who has been waiting for this moment, was easy and willing to do. I let go and stepped through. It was as if I was walking on air. I could move but I felt no pressure of up, down, front, back or sideways. It was as if I had become part of everything. He again extended his sleeve. I reach up into it and we merged. It was as if I no longer had a hand, but flowed with his thoughts and all the power and knowledge of the universe was mine for the asking. As we began to travel, his thoughts (soothingly) began to flow into my mind, to let me know that to pass this test I needed to remember to focus on the symbol as I had been taught, to the point in which nothing that touched me would be felt or responded to. The travel was breath taking in itself, as we were traveling through the stars without a ship. The Universe was ours alone. As we traveled, he motioned and thought, ���We go there.��� I saw four stars, everything seemed to move even faster and then I was in a dimly lit room. It was warmer than being in space, like the first warm day in spring. We waited awhile, and then we moved forward into a room I had not seen there. There was a glass domed chamber table that had glass tubes running into it. I found myself lying on the table (for the first time I heard his thoughts without being touched), ���All is well, look up and see our symbol, remember what you have been taught, be in the mist for I will be there for you.��� All our training was done in the nude. This was so every part of our bodies could be in touch with the Universe. I traveled there nude and lay there nude. I looked up at our symbol until it began to spin and become a spreading whitish gray mist. He was there, a part of the mist, surrounding me, comforting me on my trust in him. Then he said I had passed and must return to my body. I was no longer in the chamber. My Elder motioned for me to follow. I could not see where we were going, but he spoke to my mind that we would be watching all the remaining children as they took their test. Without feeling it we had traveled upward. There were some other children there; the place was dark except for the dim light below from the glass chamber. We were not allowed to touch or speak to each other (this was the second test), only watch to see if the other children would pass the first test and join us. There had to more than one chamber. We watched as one child after another appeared in the chamber. They had to remain motionless as either rats or snakes entered and left the chamber. It amazed me that I had never felt them. Then a child moved, instantly the snakes struck. There was no more need to see if others passed, the lesson was learned, to fail was to die. Yes, I am terrified of things that wiggle or scamper across the floor. I have not remembered the travel back, only arriving back and stepping back through the portal, with calming words that said, ���When you risk everything, as you must, sometimes you die in the process. The rest must go on for the greater good.��� The woman was there and she touched me, instantly all I seen and done passed to her. She thought, ���You have done well. Your Elder is well pleased. You will begin a study to strengthen what you have already learned. What I did not understand at the time was that little if any time had passed from the time I entered the portal until I left it. What brought more of these memories back was an event in my early 30���s while at Ft Leavenworth. It was a hot summer day, when a voice behind me said one of the sing-song chants. My sweat felt like ice on my skin, but I was not cold. I turned to see a Major standing there with a smirk of a smile. Nothing was moving around us, we had stepped out of time into another dimension. He never spoke, but I heard every one of his thoughts to me, ���We have always known where you were, what you were doing; you will always be one of us��� (My parent���s divorced when I was six and my father had custody for several years). That night by an old tree I saw a portal, but I had learned to fear and could not step through. There is more to the story, but I do not want to bore you. As I hoped earlier, I would like to talk to those you know that would be interested and hopefully could answer some of my questions. I have known since I was a child ���we are not alone���. But those few I have found, on the net, have seemed to be like those who claim you are crazy or demon possessed. I would like to meet people like you who look at it all logically, not judging, but observing our history as a whole. Thank you for your time. I hope to hear from you.